Some years ago I found running as a wonderful practice for myself. I love to move but don’t like to do sports at all.
After a while I figured that I like running not because I get fit, but because it calms me. It’s a peace of mind that I hardly reach by any other means but substance abuse.
The first five minutes are usually fighting the inner demon, little things that feel unpleasant in body and mind and tell me to don’t do this run, it’s futile anyway. The next five minutes are filled with rage. Close and far moments pop up, which made me angry and I couldn’t resolve. I often end up arguing in my head with specific people, meanwhile figuring out, what made me angry. The third five minutes are just that. Some empty five minutes of void I pass through. And then, somewhere between 15 - 25 minutes I outrun myself.
In that last timeframe, I often have the sudden impulse to stop and walk. Not because I’m tired but because the world went quiet. And it is really nice to be able to be an empty vessel at times.
I do have meditation experience, so some of that might have swept over.
@thgie The moment I get into the water my body knows what to do, feels very much at home with the movement and enjoys it a lot. I don't have to coordinate constantly, that whole me somehow aligns. Also, much of focus goes to breathing.
Something like all of this, maybe. And you, do you know why it's running for you?
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